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Ah, you have come here seeking philosophical advice. Please, be seated, relax, and contemplate the following...

Joshu's Dog:

A monk asked Joshu, a Chinese Zen master: `Has a dog Buddha-nature or not?'

Joshu answered: `Mu.' [Mu is the negative symbol in Chinese, meaning `No-thing' or `Nay'.]

A Parable:

A man traveling across a field encountered a tiger. He fled, the tiger after him. Coming to a precipice, he caught hold of the root of a wild vine and swung himself down over the edge. The tiger sniffed at him from above. Trembling, the man looked down to where, far below, another tiger was waiting to eat him. Only, the vine sustained him.

Two mice, one white and one black, little by little started to gnaw away the vine. The man saw a luscious strawberry near him. Grasping the vine with one hand, he plucked the strawberry with the other. How sweet it tasted!

Is That so?:

The Zen Master Hakuin was praised by his neighbors as one living a pure life. A beautiful Japanese girl whose parents owned a food store lived near him. Suddenly, without any warning, her parents discovered she was with a child.

This made her parents angry. She would not confess who the man was, but after much harassment at last named Hakuin.

In great Anger the parents went to the master. "Is that so?" was all he would say.

After the child was born it was brought to Hakuin. By this time he had lost his reputation, which did not trouble him, but he took very good care of the child. He obtained milk from his neighbors and everything else the little one needed.

A year later the girl-mother could stand it no longer. She told her parents the truth-that the real father of the child was a young man who worked in the fish market.

The mother and father of the girl at once went to Hakuin to ask his forgiveness, to apologize at length, and to get the child back again.

Hakuin was willing. In yielding the child, all he said was: "Is that so?"

Hyakujo's Fox:

Once when Hyakujo delivered some Zen lectures an old man attended them, unseen by the monks. At the end of each talk when the monks left so did he. But one day he remained after the had gone, and Hyakujo asked him: `Who are you?'

The old man replied: `I am not a human being, but I was a human being when the Kashapa Buddha preached in this world. I was a Zen master and lived on this mountain. At that time one of my students asked me whether the enlightened man is subject to the law of causation. I answered him: "The enlightened man is not subject to the law of causation." For this answer evidencing a clinging to absoluteness I became a fox for five hundred rebirths, and I am still a fox. Will you save me from this condition with your Zen words and let me get out of a fox's body? Now may I ask you: Is the enlightened man subject to the law of causation?'

Hyakujo said: `The enlightened man is one with the law of causation.'

At the words of Hyakujo the old man was enlightened. `I am emancipated,' he said, paying homage with a deep bow. `I am no more a fox, but I have to leave my body in my dwelling place behind this mountain. Please perform my funeral as a monk.' The he disappeared.

The next day Hyakujo gave an order through the chief monk to prepare to attend the funeral of a monk. `No one was sick in the infirmary,' wondered the monks. `What does our teacher mean?'

After dinner Hyakujo led the monks out and around the mountain. In a cave, with his staff he poked out the corpse of an old fox and then performed the ceremony of cremation.

That evening Hyakujo gave a talk to the monks and told this story about the law of causation.

Obaku, upon hearing this story, asked Hyakujo: `I understand that a long time ago because a certain person gave a wrong Zen answer he became a fox for five hundred rebirths. Now I was to ask: If some modern master is asked many questions, and he always gives the right answer, what will become of him?'

Hyakujo said: `You come here near me and I will tell you.'

Obaku went near Hyakujo and slapped the teacher's face with this hand, for he knew this was the answer his teacher intended to give him.

Hyakujo clapped his hands and laughed at the discernment. `I thought a Persian had a red beard,' he said, `and now I know a Persian who has a red beard.'

Do Not Think Good, Do Not Think Not-Good:

When he became emancipated the sixth patriarch received from the fifth patriarch the bowl and robe given from the Buddha to his successors, generation after generation.

A monk named E-myo out of envy pursued the patriarch to take this great treasure away from him. The sixth patriarch placed the bowl and robe on a stone in the road and told E-myo: `These objects just symbolize the faith. There is no use fighting over them. If you desire to take them, take them now.'

When E-myo went to move the bowl and robe they were as heavy as mountains. He could not budge them. Trembling for shame he said: `I came wanting the teaching, not the material treasures. Please teach me.'

The sixth patriarch said: `When you do not think good and when you do not think not-good, what is your true self?'

At these words E-myo was illumined. Perspiration broke out all over his body. He cried and bowed, saying: `You have given me the secret words and meanings. Is there yet a deeper part of the teaching?'

The sixth patriarch replied: `What I have told you is no secret at all. When you realize your true self the secret belongs to you.'

E-myo said: `I was under the fifth patriarch for many years but could not realize my true self until now. Through your teaching I find the source. A person drinks water and knows himself whether it is cold or warm. May I call you my teacher?'

The sixth patriarch replied: `We studied together under the fifth patriarch. Call him your teacher, but just treasure what you have attained.'

Not a Dead One:

An ex-emperor asked the master Gudo:
What happens to a man of enlightenment after death?

Gudo replied:
How should I know?

The ex-emperor said:
Why?- because you are a master.

Gudo said:
Yes, sir, but not a dead one!

The Three Calls of the Emperor's Teacher:

Chu, called Kokushi, the teacher of the emperor, called to his attendant: `Oshin.'

Oshin answered: `Yes.'

Chu repeated, to test his pupil: `Oshin.'

Oshin repeated: `Yes.'

Chu called: `Oshin.'

Oshin answered: `Yes.'

Chu said `I ought to apologize for you for all this calling, but really you ought to apologize to me.'

Nansen Cuts the Cat in Two:

Nansen saw the monks of the eastern and western halls fighting over a cat. He seized the cat and told the monks: `If any of you say a good word, you can save the cat.'

No one answered. So Nansen boldly cut the cat in two pieces.

That evening Joshu returned and Nansen told him about this. Joshu removed his sandals and, placing them on his head, walked out.

Nansen said: `If you had been there, you could have saved the cat.'

Zuigan Calls His Own Master:

Zuigan called out to himself every day: `Master.'

Then he answered himself: `Yes, sir.'

And after that he added: `Become sober.'

Again he answered: `Yes, sir.'

`And after that,' he continued, `do not be deceived by others.'

`Yes, sir; yes, sir,' he answered.

Two Monks Rolls Up the Screen:

Hogen of Seiryo monastery was about to lecture before dinner when he noticed that the bamboo screen lowered for meditation had not been rolled up. He pointed to it. Two monks arose from the audience and rolled it up.

Hogen, observing the physical moment, said: `The state of the first monk is good, not that of the other.'

The Taste of Banzo's Sword:

Matajuro Yagyu was the son of a famous swordsman. His father, believing that his son's work was too mediocre to anticipate mastership, disowned him. So Matajuro went to Mount Futara and there found the famous swordsman Banzo. But Banzo confirmed the father's judgment. "You wish to learn swordsmanship under my guidance?" asked Banzo. "You cannot fulfill the requirements."

"But if I work hard, how many years will it take me to become a master?" persisted the youth.

"The rest of your life," replied Banzo.

"I cannot wait that long," explained Matajuro. "I am willing to pass through any hardship if only you will teach me. If I become your devoted servant, how long might it be?"

"Oh, maybe ten years," Banzo relented.

"My father is getting old, and soon I must take care of him," continued Matajuro. "If I work far more intensively, how long would it take me?"

"Oh, maybe thirty years," said Banzo.

"Why is that?" asked Matajuro. "First you say ten and now thirty years. I will undergo any hardship to master this art in the shortest time!"

"Well," said Banzo, "in that case you will have to remain with me for seventy years. A man in such hurry as you are to get results seldom learns quickly."

"Very well," declared the youth, understanding at last that he was being rebuked for impatience, "I agree."

Matajuro was told never to speak of fencing and never to touch a sword. He cooked for his master, washed the dishes, made his bed, cleaned the yard, cared for the garden, all without a word of swordsmanship.

Three years passed. Still Matajuro labored on. Thinking of his future, he was sad. He had not even begun to learn the art to which he had devoted his life.

But one day Banzo crept up behind him and gave him a terrific blow with a wooden sword. The following day, when Matajuro was cooking rice, Banzo again sprang upon him unexpectedly. After that, day and night, Matajuro had to defend himself from unexpected thrusts. Not a moment passed in any day that he did not have to think of the taste of Banzo's sword. He learned so rapidly he brought smiles to the face of his master. Matajuro became the greatest swordsman in the land.

Muddy Road:

Tanzan and Ekido were once traveling together down a muddy road. A heavy rain was still falling.

Coming around a bend, they met a lovely girl in a silk kimono and sash, unable to cross the intersection.

"Come on, girl," said Tanzan at once. Lifting her in his arms, he carried her over the mud.

Ekido did not speak again until that night when they reached a lodging temple. Then he no longer could restrain himself. "We monks don't go near females," he told Tanzan, "especially not young and lovely ones. It is dangerous. Why did you do that?"

"I left the girl there," said Tanzan. "Are you still carrying her?"

Tozan's Three Blows:

Tozan went to Ummon. Ummon asked him where he had come from.

Tozan said: `From Sato village.'

Ummon asked: `In what temple did you remain for the summer?'

Tozan replied: `The temple of Hoji, south of the lake.'

`When did you leave there?' asked Ummon, wondering how long Tozan would continue with such factual answers.

`The twenty-fifth of August,' answered Tozan.

Ummon said: `I should give you three blows with a stick, but today I forgive you.'

The next day Tozan bowed to Ummon and asked: `Yesterday you forgave me three blows. I do not know why you thought me wrong.'

Ummon, rebuking Tozan's spiritless responses, said: `You are good for nothing. You simply wander from one monastery to another.'

Before Ummon's words were ended Tozan was enlightened.

It is Not Mind, It is Not Buddha, It is Not Things:

A monk asked Nansen: `Is there a teaching no master ever preached before?'

Nansen said: `Yes, there is.'

`What is it?' asked the monk.

Nansen replied: `It is not mind, it is not Buddha, it is not things.'

Kashapa's Preaching Sign:

Anada asked Kashapa: `Buddha gave you the golden-woven robe of successorship. What else did he give you?'

Kashapa said: `Ananda.'

Ananda answered: `Yes, brother.'

Said Kashapa: `Now you can take down my preaching sign and put up your own.'

Not the Wind, Not the Flag:

Two monks were arguing about a flag. One said: `The flag is moving.'

The other said: `The wind is moving.'

The sixth patriarch happened to be passing by. He told them: `Not the wind, not the flag; mind is moving.'

Kyogen Mounts the Tree:

Kyogen said: `Zen is like a man hanging in a tree by his teeth over a precipice. His hands grasp no branch, his feet rest on no limb, and under the three another person asks him: `Why does Bodhidharma come to China from India?'

`If the man in tree does not answer, he fails; and if he does answer, he falls and loses his life. Now what shall he do?'

Buddha Twirls a Flower:

When Buddha was in Grdhrakuta mountain he turned a flower in his fingers and held in before his listeners. Every one was silent. Only Maha-Kashapa smiled at this revelation, although he tried to control the lines of his face.

Buddha said: `I have the eye of the true teaching, the heart of Nirvana, the true aspect of non-form, and the ineffable stride of Dharma. It is not expressed by words, but especially transmitted beyond teaching. This teaching I have given to Maha-Kashapa.'

Keichu's Wheel:

Getsuan said to this students: `Keichu, the first wheel-maker of China, made two wheels of fifty spokes each. Now, suppose you removed the nave uniting the spokes. What would become of the wheel? And had Keichu done this could he be called the master wheel-maker?'

The Thief Who Became a Disciple:

One evening as Shichiri Kojun was reciting sutras, a thief with a sharp sword entered, demanding either his money or his life.

Shichiri told him: "Do not disturb me. You can find the money in that drawer." Then he resumed his recitation.

A little while afterwards he stopped and called: "Don't take it all. I need some to pay taxes with tomorrow."

The intruder gathered up most of the money and started to leave. " Thank a person when you receive a gift," Shichiri added. The man thanked him and made off.

A few days afterwards the fellow was caught and confessed, among others, the offense against Shichiri. When Shichiri was called as a witness he said: "This man is no thief, at least as far as I am concerned. I gave him the money and he thanked me for it."

After he had finished his prison term, the man went to Shichiri and became his disciple.

Tap-Tap:

Nansen's cook-monk invited the gardener-monk to have a meal together, and went to his house and was waiting for him. As he filled his bowl, a Nembutsu Bird sang. the gardener-monk tapped his arm-rest, and the bird sang again. He tapped his arm-rest again and the bird stopped singing. The gardener-monk asked, "Do you understand?" "No," said the cook-monk. The gardener-monk tapped once more.

Tipping Over a Water Vase:

Hyakujo wished to send a monk to open a new monastery. He told his pupils that whoever answered a question most ably would be appointed. Placing a water vase on the ground, he asked: "Who can say what this is without calling its name?" The chief monk said: "No one can call it a wooden shoe." Isan, the cooking monk, tipped over the vase with his foot and went out. Hyakujo smiled and said: "the chief monk loses." And Isan became the master of the new monastery.

Tosotsu Estu Osho Devised three barriers as tests for his students:

1.You pull the weeds and study the profound mystery only in order to see into your original nature. Where is your original nature at this moment?

2.One who has realized his own original nature escapes from birth-and-death. When the light of your eyes falls to the ground, how will you escape?

3.One who has escaped from birth-and-death knows whither he goes. When the Four great Elements that compose your body separate, where will you go?

Huineng:

A strong wind was blowing the temple banner, and he overheard two monks arguing, one saying that the flag was moving, the other that the wind was moving. They argued back and forth without getting to the truth, so Huineng said, "May a layman interrupt your lofty discussion? It is not the wind or the flag that is moving - your minds are moving."

Yunju:

"If you want to realize such a thing, you must be such a person."
"Once you are such a person, why worry about such a thing?"

Everyday Life is the Path:

Joshu asked Nansen: "What is the path?"
Nansen said: "Everyday life is the path."
Joshu asked: "Can it be studied?"
Nansen said: "If you try to study, you will be far away from it."
Joshu asked: "If I do not study, how can I know it is the path?"
Nansen said: "The path does not belong to the perception world, neither does it belong to the nonperception world. Cognition is a delusion and noncognition is senseless. if you want to reach the true path beyond doubt, place yourself in the same freedom as sky. You name it neither good nor not-good." At these words Joshu was enlightened.

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